I thought of you with love today...

I thought of you with love today but that is nothing new
I thought about you yesterday and days before that too,
I think of you in silence I often speak your name
All I have are memories and your picture in a frame
Your memory is my keepsake with which I’ll never part
God has you in His keeping I have you in my heart.

Today has been a decent day.  Started off kind of weird though.  Do you ever have them dreams where it is SO real that when you wake up you have to literally replay it in your mind and keep thinking “did that REALLY happen?”  Well I had one of them dreams last night.  It wasn’t a bad dream, just really weird.  I FINALLY dreamed about Derrek though, which is a huge blessing.  But what’s weird is, in my dream I figured out there was some kind of weird conspiracy and that Derrek was still alive.  That somehow it was some other guy that I didn’t even know had had the accident and Derrek was fine.  Finally, Derrek got home and told me the story on how it wasn’t him that had passed away and that he was fine.  The weird thing is the dream didn’t have a lot of detail—that I remember.  It was just basically that Derrek was still live but for some reason he was like “captured” and couldn’t make it home until he escaped….very random. But the good thing is I got to see his face.  Derrek is so gorgeous and in my dream he was just perfect.  No scratches, bruises, or cuts.  He was My Sweet Derrek. Perfect.  Just like the last time I saw him, at 3 a.m. March 24, 2011 kissing me goodbye in our bedroom before he left. 

Today has been a good day too because, Derrek’s and my friends, whom have been a true Godsend during all of this, had already been thinking about a Memorial Fishing Tournament in Derrek’s name.  I truly believe that Derrek gave me the idea and gave me the courage to write about it and then it all worked out from there.  Like, I said before I know absolutely nothing about fishing tournaments, but his friend does.  I mean honestly, that is not luck that Derrek’s fishing enthusiast friend had the same thought I did, it is another one of God’s blessings because now there is someone willing to help me that knows something about how these things work.  I mean of course my Mom and the rest of my family and friends will help me, but I have someone on my side now that knows what needs to be done.  I am just really intrigued to see where this will go.  I really believe that this is something that Derrek would be SO proud of.  That’s my goal in everything I do is to make God and Derrek proud so that one day I will be able to be with Derrek again in Heaven.  The Bible says that in Heaven there is no sorrow or death.  I couldn’t imagine a better place and I know that one day Derrek and I will spend eternity together there.  15 weeks and 3 days ago I would have never thought that Derrek would have to wait for me to get there; which just proves that God has his own plan for each and every one of us. 

Which brings me to my next subject; life is short.  Some people “short” may mean 90 years, other people “short” means 18.  You never know when it is your time to go.  I urge anyone reading this to please make yourself right with God so that when your times comes you will be accepted into Heaven. Tomorrow may be your last day on Earth, your last day to kiss your wife, or husband, bye, so please don’t forget to tell your loved how much you love them.  You can never say I love you too much.  That is one thing I am so thankful for; that Derrek knew that I love him more than anything on this Earth.  It is comforting to know that.  Okay, enough preaching, but seriously think about yourself for a minute.  Look at yourself and ask “If I die tomorrow do I know that I will go to Heaven?”  If the answer is no then it’s time to make some changes….

Thinking about making oneself right with God makes me remember when Derrek and I were baptized together.  We were baptized in the same church that I went to all my life, that we were married in, and Derrek had his celebration of life at.  We were baptized together on June 18, 2008.  It was our 6 month anniversary.  We got married on June 19, 2009, we had been together for 1 year, 6 months, and 1 day. 

Time for a baby update now.  I measured a week behind today at Dr. Melton’s.  Which just means that Trey McCoy Snodgrass will not be a monster sized baby (hopefully not anything like that 16 lb. baby that mother in Texas DELIVERED!) Dr. Melton assured me that measuring small was perfectly fine for someone like me because I am a “small” person.  Definitely referring to my height and nothing else, lol.  I go back in 2 weeks for another check-up and Trey’s 4D ultrasound.  I cannot wait to see my beautiful little man! These 2 weeks are going to go by s-l-o-w.  Trey is the one thing in my life that I can look forward to.  I am so blessed that God came him to Derrek and I.  I know I could not have made it through this without the thought that soon I will have a little piece of Derrek with me. 
Well, I think that is enough for today.  Until next time, God Bless.

Love,

Brook Snodgrass